Oh Dick, what are we going to do with you?

After seeing a variety of media reports on Dick Cheney’s speech to AIPAC yesterday, I made the mistake of actually reading through the whole transcript. The Vice President was in rare form, even rolling out a new speech built around what Cheney described as four “myths.”

1. “Iraq has nothing to do with the global war on terror.”

2. “[O]ne can support the troops without giving them the tools and reinforcements needed to carry out their mission.”

3. “[G]etting out of Iraq before the job is done will actually strengthen America’s hand in the fight against terrorists.”

4. “[W]e can abandon the effort in Iraq without serious consequences to the broader Middle East.”

Now, I started writing a detailed response to each of these “myths,” explaining why Cheney clearly doesn’t know what he’s talking about, but then I realized, that’s probably pointless. Cheney is too mendacious to be taken seriously. His demagoguery warrants mockery and derision — substantive responses to such transparent nonsense is a bit too similar to wrestling with a pig.

That said, I’m afraid I can’t help myself on Myth #2. Cheney actually believes he has the authority — politically and morally — to lecture his critics about supporting the troops by giving them the tools they need? Even the most ignorant political figures should probably be at least tacitly aware of the fact that troops still don’t have the body armor they need, and their Humvees still haven’t been equipped with the advanced armor kits that could help save Americans lives. Given this, it’s almost as if Cheney were criticizing himself yesterday.

“Myths” aside, Cheney apparently couldn’t resist his old standby: to criticize the White House is to undermine the troops.

“When members of Congress pursue an anti-war strategy that’s been called slow bleed, they’re not supporting the troops, they are undermining them. And when members of Congress speak not of victory, but of time limits — (applause) — when members speak not of victory but of time limits, deadlines or other arbitrary measures, they’re telling the enemy simply to watch the clock and wait us out.”

Speaker Pelosi’s office was not amused.

“It is a disservice to our military personnel for President Bush and Vice President Cheney to continue to advocate for an open-ended commitment in Iraq, while brushing aside the advice of military leaders and the bipartisan Iraq Study Group, all of whom argue that the war in Iraq cannot be resolved militarily but only through diplomatic, economic and political means. As the Vice President’s remarks today prove again, the Administration’s answer to continuing violence in Iraq is more troops and more treasure from the American people.”

That’s not bad, but like Matt Yglesias, I don’t think it’s nearly dismissive enough. Cheney believes the best way to support the troops is to put them into the middle of a civil war without the equipment they need. Yglesias recommends a harsher kind of response.

I still don’t feel that Democrats have located the appropriately disrespectful tone for responding to Cheney’s foreign policy pearls of wisdom. If David Duke were to slam Pelosi as insufficiently committed to white supremacy, she wouldn’t start quibbling with him. Getting smeared by Cheney isn’t the same as that (but let him complain then come back with, sorry, it’s easy to get confused when you’re talking about one of congress’ foremost supporters of the apartheid regime in South Africa), but it’s still a situation where his attacks should be worn as a badge of honor. Substantively, the man is a horror. Conveniently, he’s also wildly unpopular. I mean, he’s got to be one of the least-popular major American political figures ever. It seems to me that “When Dick Cheney criticizes the House Democrats, that’s how we know we must be doing something right” is along the right lines.

Sounds right to me.

Cheney is in direct line of buffoon vice-presidents, just more dangerously powerful than most. Gore was the exception that made people actually think a v-p could be more than a moronic alter-ego for the president. Cheney is Spiro Agnew with secret spies.

  • Happy spins to you, until you speak again.
    Happy spins to you, keep lying until then.
    Who cares about the facts when we’re together?
    Just spout a line and keep on snarling happy.
    Happy spins to you, ’till you speak again.

    Some spins are mined ones,
    Others are gold.
    It’s the way you color the spin that counts,
    Here’s a bloody one for you.

    Happy spins to you, until you speak again.
    Happy spins to you, keep lying until then.
    Who cares about the facts when we’re together?
    Just spout a line and keep on snarling happy.

    Happy spins to you, ’till you speak again.

    Hope you like the heat of Dubai, ya bastard Dick.
    (No offense to human bastards.)

  • It’s well documented that criminals who remain unapprehended will get more and more audacious in their crimes. Cheney just keeps lying with greater and greater audacity because the MSM dutifully stenographs his comments as legitimate discourse rather than poining out his comments and saying, “WTF?” Bust his *ss guys. It will only get worse if you don’t.

  • I think the more important thing is that AIPAC, the most powerful lobby in Washington, is firmly behind the lying madman, and they’re still making noises like they want to attack Iran.

    These people need to be brought down now, before they launch us into the real quagmire.

  • Now, I started writing a detailed response to each of these “myths,” explaining why Cheney clearly doesn’t know what he’s talking about, but then I realized, that’s probably pointless. Cheney is too mendacious to be taken seriously. His demagoguery warrants mockery and derision — substantive responses to such transparent nonsense is a bit too similar to wrestling with a pig.

    That said, I think a lot of what smart liberals could be doing better- especially our smart, young liberals who aren’t so sure yet how to handle themselves and of what to do- is counter stuff like this; think out the reasons and arguments for everyone to use and understand. Sure, it’s yeoman’s work. Sure, if you’re smart enough to be thinking about issues among the avant garde of the political philosophy or public policy scenes, it can seem mundane by comparison. But if we don’t do better rhetorically than the Republicans it’s exactly because all our smart people- much smarter than the Republicans- just don’t want to think about things like that and don’t feel like they have to.

    When I’m working on arguments and legal problems for law school, do I think it’s the most difficult or incredible thing I could be doing, when I enjoy thinking about moral and political philosophy in my spare time? Of course not. But I take a workman’s pride in thinking about arguments and the law, and I know it’s work that needs doing.

    Besides this, I’ll take on this one:

    [G]etting out of Iraq before the job is done will actually strengthen America’s hand in the fight against terrorists.

    I don’t think the WH actually has a strategist. They have guys in the Pentagon telling them not to do the surge. The enemy in Iraq sees how costly staying there is to us. Probably, right now, everyone there who is against us is just waiting for the next thing- for us to get out. They know that we’re not going to stay there for decades upon decades when we keep taking such costs and don’t get a benefit to show for it. So they have something to look forward to. When we leave, if we can attack the enemy from over the horizon (what enemy there is that still wants to take up arms after we’re out of the country) then they’ll learn that even after occupation, they won’t be able to organize and our leaving won’t make it possible for them to be terrorists- they won’t win, and then they’ll realize terrorism was not worth it and they shouldn’t have picked up arms.

    Cheney and the neocons are not strategists; they work for their egos (by trying to make their theories reality) or for political gain.

  • I used to write letters about politics to my local paper. Some people may think that’s a waste of time- but that’s thinking that the people who read the opinion section of local newspapers (and the people in their lives they talk to) are a waste of time.

    And that’s about as wrong as you can get.

  • Re: comment 6:

    Sure, some may say that not being constantly in the enemies’ faces in Iraq will allow them to organize better-

    but that’s ignoring the nice distinction our military experts make when they say that victory in Iraq will have to be political, and not just a military victory. Sure, tactically, in the short term, you can make it harder for him to organize a specific effort. But if those efforts on your part motivate him to keep trying, what’s the point? If the goal is to get him to put his weapons down, then you need to do things in a way that contributes to that and not just to short term efforts- and not in a way that causes more and more short term challenges to spring up.

  • As a blues musician, I dig LG’s comment, but in the spirit of Swan taking on a comment, I’ll take on #4:

    4. “[W]e can abandon the effort in Iraq without serious consequences to the broader Middle East.”

    The Iraq Study Group (or Baker-Hamilton) report that was endorsed by Howard Dean on The Democratic Party web site 5 days after it was issued offer specific recommendations how we would not “abandon” Iraq and how we could involve countries in the Middle East (Syria, Iran, Saudi Arabia) to ensure stability in Iraq and the region.

    And, yes, Rush, Sean, and Fox News bootlickers, it’s A Plan with 17 specific recommendations – yes, the Democrats have a plan.

    And Dick’s plan is to bring stability to the Middle East by escalating the war, thus inciting more violence in Iraq and maybe attacking Iran?

    Okay, then.

  • This “not supporting the troops” meme is a stymie for effective Dem turn-around of the war effort. It seems to me, in no way an expert, from what I gather, that blocking funding is the strongest card in the Democratic Congress’s hand. Unfortunately, it’s the one they seem most scared to use. Murtha approximated to it in a roundabout way, kowtowing to the “support the troops” imperative by including conditions of readiness, etc. Fine — but given the opportunity to slam the brakes on the whole misguided, illegal enterprise should the Democrats really be concerned about a vacuous “not supporting the troops” stigma? Personally, I don’t think so.

  • When a sitting Vice President openly promotes the continued murder—and yes, boys and girls; I am using the “Big M word” here—of the men and women who wear the uniform of this nation’s military forces, in order to promote the furtherance of war profiteering and political polarization of the People, then it is time for that sitting Vice President—who now represents the most heinous definition of the terrorist, being “one who seeks to foment mass destruction, sorrow, loss, and death upon the homeland”—to be removed from power—regardless of the means by which that removal is effected.

    Furthermore, any individual, group, institution, organization, or corporation who seeks to offer this terrorist; this Cheney-thing, any form of support, aid, comfort, assistance, financial recompense, shelter, oratorical defense, or social cameraderie, should likewise be deemed a terrorist—and an enemy of the rule of Law, of these United States of America, of the Constitution, and of the People….

  • Yglesias has the right idea here. My response would be something like:

    “Dick Cheney’s dismal track record–and the awful consequences other Americans have borne for his failures of judgment–suggests that almost anything the vice-president opposes is probably a good idea.”

  • Obviously terrifying is that this person also once ran a powerful, corrupt corporation. If Cheney represents the typical CEO in America today we’re probably luckier than we realize. Things could be far worse considering the corporate sense of entitlement regarding how this country should be run.

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