Dean Barnett, writing in the Weekly Standard, noted the kind of cultural qualities he’d like to see in our presidential candidates.
Now imagine what a candidate could get done if he achieved fluency in pop culture. Picture a candidate who could effortlessly segue from paying homage to Dale Earnhardt’s #3 to saying how much High Noon has always meant to him. Conjure up a contender who could unashamedly admit that if owning every George Strait record makes him a square, so be it, and then quickly pivot to the many times tears welled in his eyes when sports heroes like Curt Schilling or Willis Reed rose above pain to perform in an almost super-human fashion.
It prompted Stephen Bainbridge, himself a conservative, to explain that Barnett isn’t describing “pop culture,” but rather “rural Southern culture.” And while there’s nothing wrong with Southerners, per se, Bainbridge wonders if we’ve had quite enough of the good ol’ boys for a while — “maybe it’s time to let a Yankee city boy have a chance.”
Personally, if I wanted to choose a President based on his or her fluency with pop culture (which is about the dumbest criteria I’ve ever seen anyway), I’d look for somebody who:
Can effortlessly segue from paying homage to Merlot Clone #3 to saying how much The Matrix has always meant to him. Conjure up a contender who could unashamedly admit that if owning every Bruce Springsteen record makes him a left-leaning pinko, so be it, and then quickly pivot to the many times tears welled in his eyes during the second quarter of Super Bowl XLI.
Could the cultural zeitgeist be shifting? I like Springsteen, Super Bowls, and The Matrix, too!
Indeed, Bainbridge extends his “useless Presidential criteria” to include items such as:
* Won’t wink at the Queen
* Doesn’t hunt, fish, or go with girls who do
* Is sometimes accused of having a metrosexual streak
* Can credibly debate the relative claims of The Matrix, Star Wars, Bladerunner, and Star Trek II to be the greatest science fiction movie of all time
* Came from a state that didn’t secede
* Can recite at least one Monty Python skit from memory
* Can credibly debate the relative claims of Blazing Saddles, The Producers, and Young Frankenstein to be Mel Brook’s best movie, while explaining why Spaceballs is a candidate for the worst movie ever
* Has never sat through an entire Woody Allen movie, an entire Nascar race, or an entire Dixie Chicks concert
* Wouldn’t camp out 5 days to get Garth Brooks tickets even if s/he was camping at the time
* Doesn’t play golf
I love this list, in large part because, if I were judging the relative merits of presidential candidates on cultural grounds, I might very well use some of these exact questions (especially the one about golf).
Conventional wisdom is that “real guys,” the type who win modern presidential campaigns, have to enjoy NASCAR, hunting, and Larry the Cable Guy. Maybe it’s time for the conventional wisdom to change. The South has already had its fun.