Alberto, we’re laughing at you, not with you

July 24, 2007

I know it’s serious, and I realize the gravity of the problem, but listening to the Senate Judiciary Committee grill Attorney General Alberto Gonzales has been laugh-out-loud hilarious. Indeed, it’s not unusual for assembled spectators to chuckle if a witness and senator are joking around, but in this morning’s session, the audience was laughing at Gonzales’ responses because they were so transparently ridiculous.

There’s plenty to write about, but there was one four-minute exchange between Gonzales and Sen. Arlen Specter (R-Pa.) that was significant for a variety of reasons, some funnier than others. From the first half of the exchange:

SPECTER: Let me move quickly through a series of questions there’s a lot to cover. Starting with the issue Mr. Comey raises, you said “there has not been any disagreement about the program.” Mr. Comey’s testimony was that “Mr. Gonzales began to discuss why they were there to seek approval” and he then says “I was very upset, I was angry, I thought I had just witnessed an effort to take advantage of a very sick man.”

GONZALES: The disagreement that occurred was about other intelligence activities and the reason for the visit to the hospital was about other intelligence activities. It was not about the terrorist surveillance program that the president announced to the American people.

SPECTER: Mr. Attorney General, do you expect us to believe that?

They shouldn’t. Last year, Gonzales told the Senate Judiciary Committee there was no disagreement about the program. Then Comey said there was a lot of disagreement about the program. A month ago, Gonzales said he and Comey were referring to the same program. This morning, Gonzales said he and Comey were referring to different programs.

Gonzales has been an embarrassment to himself for quite a while, but this morning was a new low. Either he was confirming the existence of a secret surveillance program today, in which case he was lying last month, or he was lying today and telling the truth last month.

But wait, it gets better.

Specter didn’t buy Gonzales’ latest tall tale, but he progressed to the next point anyway: what did Gonzales hope to accomplish in Ashcroft’s hospital room when he was sedated and incapacitated?

Gonzales: Obviously, there was concern about General Ashcroft’s condition, and would not have sought, nor did we intend, to get any approval from General Ashcroft if, in fact, he wasn’t fully competent to make that decision. But General Ashcroft, there are no rules governing whether General Ashcroft can decide, “I’m feeling well enough to make this decision.”

Specter: But Attorney General Gonzales, he had already given up his authority as Attorney General. Ashcroft was no longer Attorney General.

Gonzales: And he could always reclaim that. There are no rules–

Specter: While he’s in the hospital? Under sedation? (laughter in the room)

Gonzales: Again, we didn’t know, we knew, of course that he was, was ill, he’d had surgery–

Specter: We’re not making any progress here, let me go to another topic.

One might assume Gonzales would resign just so he could stop being humiliated like this.

Why should he resign? He can sit up there and lie his pants off, and there aren’t any negative consequences for him. Bush won’t fire him and the Democrats aren’t impeaching him. God, this is infuriating.

  • Sounds like the senators knew exactly what to expect and simply wanted to get AGAG on the record to form the basis of the next step in the saga. Like slowly baiting the clueless hyena until it falls into the waiting trap.

    Good for them. 🙂

  • Gonzales: Again, we didn’t know, we knew, of course that he was, was ill, he’d had surgery–

    I wish Spectre had let him finish that statement, it would have been interesting to see where GoneZo went with that one.

    It looks like he was trying to say he didn’t know how sick Ashcroft was (“No one could have possibly foreseen that a man who’d had surgery wouldn’t be fully alert”) but at the time, it also looks like he didn’t stop to ask the staff how he was doing or if he was well enough for a bunch of visitors.

    Has anyone thought of getting the staff on duty to testify? I know this isn’t a trial but it could be interesting.

    Mr. Comey’s testimony was that “Mrs. Gonzales began to discuss why they were there to seek approval”

    I assume this is a transcriptionist’s error if not: [snerk!]

  • It’s sure good to see Gonzo being filleted by a Republican, but I wonder if Arlen Specter will listen to Gonzo lie his ass off about their FISA violations, put on a good show of being really angry, and then turn around and refuse to impeach Bush for running a patently unconstitutional spying program and committing thousands of felonies (each warrantless incursion is a seperate felony under the law).

    True is right, this is maddening. The criminals are literally daring congress to impeach them.

  • It now seems obvious that Gonzo has transformed himself into the whipping boy for the unsavory corruption of this WH. He seems to be willing to take the beatings so the morale of his fellow travelers can improve – as if such a thing could ever be entertained by decent folk. -Kevo

  • Fredo is still sitting up there with that Sylvester the Cat smirk on his stupid face — you can just about see the yellow feathers of Tweety sticking out of his fat mouth (heard that here at TCR a while back, but I can’t remember to whom to give proper credit). Please Dems, someone, anyone, wipe that grin off his face and help him “recall” that America is a nation of laws.

  • He was in the hospital, we didn’t know if he was sedated or how seriously sick….HE WAS IN SURGICAL INTENSIVE CARE!

    I guess Gonzales was thinking, “Well if he can open his eyes and talk maybe he can sign also.” They knew how sick he was and that’s exactly why they were there. God, what might have happened if Comey hadn’t shown up. What was the big emergency? What were they trying so desperately to get away with?
    This shows them for the crime family they are and this man should not be in charge of our Justice department.

  • Hey, True,

    you didn’t go far enough. After 2008, Gonzales will be in demand for speaking engagements throughout conservative based law organizations. It won’t matter that he’s an incompetent liar. What he’ll have to talk about of consequence, I’ve no clue, being that his whole reason for being is to circumvent the Constitution. But no matter. In their eyes, he acquitted himself by never betraying the President, and, by extension, the party. He will always be a rock star in the eyes of fat rich white men who get fatter richer and whiter even faster when there’s a Republican in office…

    which is not to say these fat rich white men would want Al-BERRRRR-to talking to their daughter. My God, there must be SOME standards in civilized society, eh, ol’ chap?

  • Gonzales will be the first to tell you- sometimes extra-ordinary interrogation techniques are necessary to make someone talk. Maybe we should shock his balls with a car battery, make him stand for 24 hours straight under hot bright lights, and then waterboard him. I’m sure he’d be all for it.

  • I’m cautiously encouraged. This time the committee appears to be very well prepared for the BS Gonzales is slinging. Many of the questions are constructed to anticipate the kind of parsing Gonzo has done in the past.

    As I and many others have said previously, the WH can’t afford to lose Gonzales. DoJ is too critical to the WH’s larger aims: no one can serve the WH who can also gain Senate confirmation.

  • This time the committee appears to be very well prepared for the BS Gonzales is slinging.

    An army’s as good as its sergeants. The generals almost don’t matter, and a Congress is as good as its staffers.

    Props to the elves…otherwise Santa’s just this fat guy.

  • I think between Rove and Bush, they have sucked and sense of self-respect out of Fredo. He is sort of like an abused wife.

  • Aren’t there laws that prohibit convicted criminals from making money off writing or talking about their crimes?

    Another reason for impeachment.

    All the money these guys get should be returned to the coffers of the federal government since they have been receiving pay from the US for work they’ve done for the Republican party.

  • Leahy expressed his sad and complete loss of confidence in Gonzo at the end of the hearing. Okay, we’ve expressed sadness. Now WHAT IS HE GOING TO DO ABOUT IT! Sadness and impotence are an unfortunate combination. And the fun of watching the opaque Gonzo under questioning has been spent. Impeach someone, anyone. How long can Dems pretend to govern by expressing sadness and frustration. If not them, who will take back our government?

  • It’s time to impeach Gonzales. I really don’t see the downside. It might prompt him to finally resign to head off the hearings. Or it might not in which case we can have a much needed debate on prosecutorial independence, lying to Congress, illegal eavesdropping, etc. I wouldn’t rule out getting 67 votes in the Senate to convict, but even if we only get say 55 I think that’s a victory. And the Senators voting not guilty are going to be under pressure. Regardless, you have to try. You can’t let the precedent stand.

  • I think between Rove and Bush, they have sucked and sense of self-respect out of Fredo.

    That explains his complacent smile and relaxed demeanour. ;p

  • Did any of the Dems suggest Specter as a Republican veep if they hadda choose one.
    He came across MY mind when I heard that question.

    I hear he’s a horrible person to work with.
    Sounds like he’s just as bad to work AGAINST.

    Carry on, Senator.

  • …but in this morning’s session, the audience was laughing at Gonzales’ responses because they were so transparently ridiculous.

    Sort of like me everytime Bush looks at the camera and scolds the public about Iraq.
    It is like been schooled by a hotheaded moron.

    How Americans can sit there with a respect and awe is beyond comprehension…
    All Bush gets from me is voracious laughter.
    Raucous cachinnation: The ulitmate form of human contempt.

    I’m glad to hear that one of his subaltern’s got the same treatment today.
    About time… as these guys should be laugh tracked into history’s dust bin.

  • I hope TPMMuckraker.com isn’t being overly optimistic with the headline:

    “Senators Signal Gonzales Perjury Inquiry over Spying Testimony”

  • I think between Rove and Bush, they have sucked and sense of self-respect out of Fredo. He is sort of like an abused wife.

    Comment by ET

    Abu has as much self respect as he’s been told to have, which is plenty. Abu’s being a smart alecky prick because he’s been given permission to be one. That smile on his face is the smile of the guy who rightly or wrongly, thinks he’s got an ace in the hole and he may not be able to show it now but he also doesn’t have to kiss any ass.

    While Abu is dancing and shuffling for the crowd he is picturing his foot squarely on the necks of those who are disrespecting him and he believes that foot will be there one day and maybe sooner than later. The disdain Abu demonstrates in public is a pinprick tip of the iceberg of disdain that ShrubCo barely, kind of/sort of hides below the surface.

    Abu may be the one sitting in that chair but ShrubCo laughs with him and Abu is confident he will not be among the fallen but among those last standing.

  • Ha Ha. The Chief Law Enforcement Officer in the Unted States of America.

    If Congress does not act to boot this guy out of office, then the American people should seriously consider rallying behind every Democratic Primary Challenger in 08.

    What is not so funny is what comes next – after Bush leaves office – how do we stuff the “Unitary Executive” back into the box it came out of.

    I, for one, don’t want any President to have the powers Bush has accrued to himself, and think the damage done by an AG who refuses to execute the laws of the land for political reasons will do lasting damage.

  • I hope he didn’t really , and repeatedly, refer to Mr. Ashcroft as “General Ashcroft”, as the narrative here reflects. AssCrack holds no military rank that I’m aware of. Mind you, that doesn’t mean it’s not so – it would be perfectly in character for the Bush White House to have a secret organization among themselves, like the Kiss Army, with a secret handshake and magic decoder rings. Bush likely has a closetfull of fanciful military uniforms in various peacock colours, like Moammar Ghadaffi – whom he resembles in many other ways.

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