Michael Froomkin noticed a terribly amusing quote from a Dick Cheney speech in Florida this week.
“The problem with that is, there isn’t anything in John Kerry’s background — oh, for the last 30 years — that gives you any reason to believe that he would, in fact, be tough in terms of prosecuting the war on terror.”
Hmm, 30 years, what an interesting time frame to select. As Froomkin paraphrased:
“There’s nothing in John Kerry’s life since he volunteered for combat in Vietnam and won five medals while I collected five deferments that would suggest he is anywhere as tough against America’s adversaries as I am.”
Quite right. Cheney would have us believe Kerry isn’t “tough” — so long as we overlook his heroic and decorated service on the battlefield in a war that Cheney could have served in but didn’t. It reminds me of the “What have the Romans ever done for us?” scene from the Life of Brian.
“What has John Kerry ever done that shows he’d be tough against America’s enemies?”
“Well, there was that Silver Star for gallantry in action after he directed his boat under fire to chase down and kill an enemy soldier trying to kill him and his crewmates.”
“Oh. Yeah, yeah, he did do that. Uh, that’s true, yeah.”
“And there was that Bronze Star for heroic service after he rescued Green Beret Jim Rassmann, despite having been injured by shrapnel from an exploded mine.”
“Yeah, all right, I’ll grant you the Bronze Star and the Silver Star…”
“And his Combat Action Ribbon for ground combat after going ashore several times in pursuit of Viet Cong.”
“Well, yeah. Obviously the ground combat record. I mean, that goes without saying. But apart from…
“And his Presidential Unit Citation Ribbon and Navy Unit Commendation Ribbon for heroism of a unit.”
“All right, but apart from his gallantry in action, his heroism, his rescues of his crewmates, his grace under pressure, his leadership under fire, and his willingness to volunteer for an unpopular war, what has John Kerry ever down to show he’d be tough against America’s enemies?”
“Well, there were those three Purple Hearts…”