O’Reilly’s ship won’t sail

Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly had what he thought was a good idea: set up one of those celebrity cruises, charge his die-hard fans a bundle of money, and enjoy the adulation while doing his schtick on the open seas.

There was only one problem: no one’s interested.

O’Reilly’s cruise would have cost participants between $1,099 and $1,629 in return for two private gathering with O’Reilly himself, plus a lecture from former Sen. Jeremiah Denton (R-Ala.) and a symposium on “How to Combat the ACLU.” For some reason, O’Reilly’s loyal fans didn’t take the bait.

Fair and balanced doesn’t float.

A cruise featuring Fox News star Bill O’Reilly that had been shilled on the conservative pundit’s popular cable show has been cancelled due to a lack of interest.

The week-long Caribbean cruise, themed “The Battle for American Values,” hoped to have 800 passengers on board, but it fell “well short” of its goal, according to The Thomas More Law Center, which was to get a share of the revenue.

“Mr. O’Reilly, who has been a friend of our organization for a long time, wanted to go to bat for us, and a cruise sounded like a good idea at the time,” said Dan Costanzo, director of public relations for the conservative think tank.

“Unfortunately, it didn’t work out the way we hoped,” he said.

The conservative Thomas More Law Center asked the organizing travel agency for more time to generate interest in the cruise. The agency agreed to the extension, but it didn’t help.

And while O’Reilly is no doubt doubly disappointed — he won’t get the cash and he has to suffer the embarrassment — one of the few people who signed up for the cruise seems even more saddened by the cancellation.

“I’m very, very disappointed,” said liberal political comedian Al Franken. “My wife and I had made it our vacation, and we really had been looking forward to the cruise and hearing Bill O’Reilly talk about the American values all while sailing the high seas.”

A symposium on “How to Combat the ACLU”?? I know they are misguided, but why don’t these assholes just come out and be honest about the fact they they don’t believe in the Constitution of the United States.

  • I have two responses:
    1) I guess Bill O’Reilly doesn’t really represent “American Values”. Gee, what a shock.

    2) I’m disappointed too. How do you think Shrill Bill would have felt being trapped on a cruise ship with Al Franken for a week???

  • What a pity! The mates of the Black Pearl were looking forward to eight days of pillage and plunder.
    Capt Jack Sparrow

  • Hell, I’m not taking acruise to hear ANYONE speak. If I’m spending cash for a well needed vacation, I want to spend it with my wife, Senior Cuervo, Mr. J. Daniels, and his partner Jimmey Beam, while doing a personal Bible study in the book of Guinessis.

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