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I Wonder Who Jonah Goldberg’s Favorite Candidate Is?

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Guest Post by dnA

Within the first three paragraphs of Jonah Goldberg’s Sunday Outlook piece for the WaPo, which is inundated with clichés (example: “spiked like Dick Cheney’s EKG,” hyuk!) Goldberg makes this disclaimer:

As National Review put it in its editorial endorsement of Romney (I am undecided, for the record): “Each of the men running for the Republican nomination has strengths, and none has everything — all the traits, all the positions — we are looking for.”

Izzat so? Because it looks to me like Goldberg’s preferred candidate is Fred Thompson.

This is a keen problem for a candidate like Romney, because it forces him to vacillate between his credible competence message — “I can make government work” — and his strategic need to fill the “Reaganite” space left vacant by former senator George Allen’s failure to seize it and Thompson’s inability to get anyone to notice that he occupies it.

I’m not sure why I get that feeling…

Thompson is a solid, traditional, mainstream conservative. He’d be equally comfortable at an American Enterprise Institute conference, a Federalist Society luncheon or a county fair. Taken at his word, Thompson is a card-carrying Reaganite, favoring low taxes, a strong defense and a shrunken role for the federal government.

Call it an instinct.

Do you think conservatives ever notice the inherent contradiction between what they see as a “strong defense” (i.e. increased military spending) and a “shrunken role for the federal government”? Of course, with the Goldberg Principle, avoiding contradiction is a snap!

I agree with Morbo that Republicans are in much better shape than they sound like they are, especially given that the Roberts/Alito Supreme Court is poised to put a rubber stamp on voter disenfranchisement. I think the anxiety on the Right about who to choose is based less off a real substantive disagreement (because most of the electorate who went for Bush in ’04 will do so for the Republican candidate in ’08) and far more based on a desire to pick someone who they see as “electable”.

I also feel obliged to note that while Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama have both faced criticism based on their “lack of experience,” Fred Thompson’s lack of qualifications, his one and a half term spent in elected office, have drawn less scrutiny. Likewise, Rudy Giuliani’s campaign may be plummeting to Earth, but it’s not because the press did an effective job of vetting his claims of “foreign policy experience”.

Questions about the qualifications of Republican candidates are better discerned not by their expertise in matters of policy, but by the width of their shoulders or what they smell like.

Comments

  • Martin

    says:

    The bigger question is “Why should be care?” The even bigger question is, of course, “Why do newspapers give this idiot space?”

  • Former Dan

    says:

    Oh boy! Jonah Goldberg, the laziest columnist is stumping for Fred Thompson, the laziest candidate. I wonder why?

  • james k. sayre

    says:

    On the GOP side, we are presented with a spectacle of eight imperial war-mongering candidates. all babbling about “bombing Iran.” Only Ron Paul is a clear thinker on foreign affairs and he is dead-set against more stupid neo-colonial wars of aggression. The GOP will be utterly crushed in November and they will then have four years to meditate on the Bush crime family disaster that captured their party in the summer of 2000.

  • independent thinker

    says:

    Writing about people who write about Fred Thompson is even more of a waste of time than writing about Fred Thompson. Next topic please.

  • Steve

    says:

    Jokin’ Jonah is obviously unaware that “dissing” the other candidates by comparing them to “the strengths of UnAware Fred”* makes him an UnAware Fred groupie.

    Birds of a feather, and all, y’know.

    *Please excuse me, while I go out back and barf up a lung as moral recompense for using “strengths” and “UnAware Fred” in the same sentence. Pass the O-2 tank, please….

  • ROTFLMLiberalAO

    says:

    Fred Thompson’s lack of qualifications, his one and a half term spent in elected office, have drawn less scrutiny.

    Yep.
    Not are they not only the party of morality and national defense, but also experience.

    All of their candidates get three free passes at the start of the game.
    Those are just the unwritten rules.

    For example:
    Is there even one Dem candidate having anything close to The Ghoul’s sordid sexual past?
    Not really. There couldn’t be. They’d be hung on the spot.
    The closest of course are the Clintons.
    But note: the republicans are deathly silent in regards to MonicaGate.
    There is good reason for that.
    The republican leadership is shrewd about one thing:
    Let’s not hang the Clintons just yet…
    Let’s not use our free pass as the party of moral authority just yet…

    As an aside:
    Anybody out there know for sure that Bill doesn’t have a gal on the side?
    Today is Sunday. Shall we get down on our knees and pray?

  • Danp

    says:

    Lack of experience? Thompson was a politician, a lawyer, a lobbyist, an actor, and probably a used car salesman. What’s not to love about that resume? It has credibility written all over it.

  • The Answer is Orange

    says:

    For those of you in DC, JLoad will be at the K Street Borders on the 15th. Drop by and watch this bumbling idiot explain why eating health food is for Nazis!

  • Speed

    says:

    My mom has been a lifelong Republican (first presidential vote was for Nixon in 1960), but she told me recently that this “is the first time in my life I don’t like any of the GOP candidates.”

  • Frederick Paxson

    says:

    FRED THOMPSON is the best person to lead this country. He is a true conservative and has been his entire life. All one has to do is check his record to see this.

    During my time in the Army as an Intelligence Analyst, I served under both Presidents Carter and Reagan (as my commanders in chief). Without argument, President Reagan was the best commander-in-chief a military person could ever have served under. Fred Thompson possesses the same qualities and vision as President Reagan in that he is strong on national defense and sees a dire need to secure our borders and control immigration.

    I can think of no better person to lead this country and fix the problems we have. He is the only candidate from either party who has specific and detailed plans on border security and immigration reform; revitalization of America’s armed forces; saving and protecting Social Security; and tax relief and economic growth. These are detailed on his Web site at http://www.fred08.com . I challenge you to find any other candidate who has laid out specific plans to fix anything.

    Fred Thompson has published his first principles, some of which are mentioned above. In addition to those, he strongly believes in individual liberty, personal responsibility, limited government, federalism, traditional American values, the rule of law and is a strong proponent of the Second Amendment — all concepts established during the birth of our country and documented in our Constitution.

    Again, try to find any candidate who has laid out their plans to “fix” this country. You will find they all speak in vague and abstract terms on their plans.

    For those who have heard Fred Thompson speak, you will usually hear him say that the Fred Thompson you see today is the same Fred Thompson you saw yesterday and is the same Fred Thompson you will see tomorrow. He stands by his principles and values and doesn’t shift his positions based on polls or public opinion; in other words, he doesn’t say what the voters want to hear just to get elected, but remains steadfast on his views and convictions.

    During his time in the Senate he focused on three areas: to lower taxes, strengthen national security and expose waste in the federal government. Fred Thompson has foreign policy experience, having served as member of the Senate Foreign Relations and Senate Intelligence committees.

    As chairman of the Senate Governmental Affairs Committee, he opened the investigation in 1997 on the Chinese government’s attempt to influence American policies and elections, and this investigation identified connections with the Clinton administration (documented in the committee’s report).

    As a member of the Finance Committee, he worked tirelessly to enact three major tax-cut bills. Fred Thompson remains steadfast and even though a person may not agree with all his views and he understands some may disagree with him, you can count on him to be consistent and unwavering.

    Don’t be fooled by his laid back approach and what critics call his “laziness.” As a former assistant U.S. attorney, he earned a reputation as a tough prosecutor and he possesses the toughness this country needs in order to tackle today’s and tomorrow’s issues.

    I ask that you take a hard look at what this country needs, then take a hard look at all the other candidates’ views, policies, their records and their track record on consistency. Fred Thompson possesses integrity, loyalty, commitment, energy and decisiveness, all traits of an effective leader, and will emerge as the best person to take this country boldly forward.

    Please help Fred win in South Carolina:
    https://www.fred08.com/contribute.aspx?RefererID=c637caaa-315c-4b4c-9967-08d864cd0791

  • Danp

    says:

    Don’t you have to add, “I’m Fred Thompson and I approve this ad?” Oh well. at least he knows what color an orange is.

  • Mark

    says:

    Hey, Dan; that’s funny! Anyway, you mockers are all wrong – Fred Thompson is the spitting image of Ronald Reagan. No other candidate is as Reaganesque in his memory lapses, his claims not to have “read that” yet (because he’s forgotten how to read), his general disintegration before your very eyes.

    I know it’s mean to make fun of Reagan, because he had an actual disease that stole his wits and made a joke of his commanding presence. What can I say; I’m a mean guy. When you canonize somebody the way the Republicans have Reagan, you have to take him, warts and all. Fred Thompson is just like Reagan – when Reagan had forgotten who and where he was. Beyond that, the only resemblance is that both were actors.

  • zeitgeist

    says:

    ROTF:

    Is there even one Dem candidate having anything close to The Ghoul’s sordid sexual past? . . .
    The closest of course are the Clintons.

    Last I knew only one was on the ballot. Care to tell us what you know of Hillary’s alleged “sordid sexual past”? Apparently I missed it.

    Or maybe it was just a totally cheap shot.

  • dnA

    says:

    Last I knew only one was on the ballot. Care to tell us what you know of Hillary’s alleged “sordid sexual past”? Apparently I missed it.

    Yes well, don’t you know, blowjobs are very naughty.

    Is it just me or is Fred Thompson drawing support from former fans of Ron Paul?

  • zeitgeist

    says:

    Yes well, don’t you know, blowjobs are very naughty.

    indeed.
    but i was hoping ROTF had some dirty scoop on that torrid lesbian tryst between Hills and her hot young assistant of middle eastern descent. you know all of this dry policy discussion just isn’t salacious enough to really capture eyeballs when its the mention of Ron Paul that triggers record numbers of posts.

  • orion

    says:

    We know Fred occupies the Reagan space. Unfortunately its the “falling asleep constantly” aspect which he occupies…..

  • The Answer is Orange

    says:

    When I see the above post from the Thompsonite and watch the Paulattackers snarling and frothing and biting their own tails in their frenzy to defend their leader, and I realize that we’ve got months more of this crap and it is only going to become more of a Circus of Idiots … I go pour myself a drink.

  • SmilingDixie

    says:

    Why does this BOZO get any attention – let alone space in the Washington Post? If not for his sister (Monica’s good friend!), nobody would ever have heard of him.