‘I’m vice president and they’re not’

Over the weekend, Maureen Dowd unloaded on Dick Cheney. “Delusional doesn’t begin to capture the profound, transcendental one-flew-over daftness of the man,” Dowd said. “Has anyone in the history of the United States ever been so singularly wrong and misguided about such phenomenally important events and continued to insist he’s right in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary?” She went on to lament Cheney’s “exquisite kind of lunacy.”

And, in an apparent effort to prove Dowd’s point, the Vice President sat down for a lengthy chat with Newsweek. Let’s take a look at some of the highlights.

Newsweek noted that support for the president’s escalation policy has been minimal from Republicans on the Hill, and asked Cheney whether he worried that “the party last lost the stomach for the fight.” The VP responded:

“My sense of it is that what’s happened here now over the last few weeks is that the president has shored up his position with the speech he made a couple of weeks ago, specifically on Iraq. And I think the speech, frankly Tuesday night, the State of the Union address was one of his best. I think there’s been a very positive reaction of people who saw the speech. And I think to some extent that’s helped shore us up inside the party on the Hill.”

That must be some bubble Cheney’s living in. Support for the president, the war, and the administration’s strategy in Iraq have all fallen since Bush’s high-profile national addresses on the subject. “Shored up his position”? Unless the goal was to undermine support for the president and the war, Cheney has everything backwards. (And if I only had a nickel for every time I’ve had thought over the last six years….)

Newsweek went on to note that Sen. Chuck Hagel (R-Neb.) has been highly critical of the administration’s handling of the war. When Cheney dodged the question, Newsweek asked if the VP believed Hagel was “not helpful to the cause.” Cheney said:

“Let’s say I believe firmly in Ronald Reagan’s 11th commandment: Thou shalt not speak ill of a fellow Republican. But it’s very hard sometimes to adhere to that where Chuck Hagel is involved.”

It beats offering a substantive response to Hagel’s concerns, doesn’t it? In effect, Cheney said, “I could say a bunch of mean things, but I won’t because Hagel’s a Republican.” Here’s a wacky idea: how about responding to Hagel’s specific concerns? If Hagel’s wrong, why not explain why?

Asked about the status of the war, on the ground in Iraq, Cheney said:

“I think we have made significant progress.”

There’s that line again; Cheney keeps using it. Two weeks ago, Bush personally described recent events as a “slow failure,” and yet there’s the Vice President, bragging about the “significant progress.” If Cheney wants to be taken seriously, this isn’t the way to do it.

Finally, towards the very end of the interview, Newsweek noted reactions to the administration’s Iraq policy from Gerald Ford, Colin Powell, Brent Scowcroft, and others. Newsweek said, “You wouldn’t be human if it didn’t have some reaction.” To which Cheney responded:

“Well, I’m vice president and they’re not.”

Sensible, reassuring maturity from our friend, Dick Cheney. Just what we’ve come to expect from a man of his stature and significance.

FDR’s two-term veep, John Nance Garner, once said the vice presidency “wasn’t worth a bucket of warm spit” (or maybe he said “piss”). Clearly, that description is more apt for some holders of the office than others.

  • well, but grumpy, this is a little more serious. the barest minimum description of cheney’s role in the bush administration is that no decision with which cheney disagrees ever sticks.

    would that he were only a bucket of warm spit….

  • How this guy ever managed to have the career he has had is beyond me. He failed as Chief of Staff to Ford, he was a non-achiever in Congress, he gave Bush #41 bad avice over the Gulf War, he nearly ran Halliburton over the cliff with his”executive decisions” there, and now for the past 6 years he has gone from worse to worst.

    And yet people consider him “competent.” Is it because he has no charisma, so they all figure he could only have achieved things by being really smart?

  • “And yet people consider him “competent.” Is it because he has no charisma, so they all figure he could only have achieved things by being really smart? ”

    As we used to say when I worked in corporate America, “cream rises, but shit floats.”

  • ***“Well, I’m vice president and they’re not.”***
    ——————-Das Cheney

    So, this makes him what—the “Assistant Decider” or something?

    His Newsweek interview shows other ominous concerns, in that he emphasizes security as the primal military task in the ME, declares that the majority of countries in the Iraq region actually want the US to be in Iraq, and openly refuses to comment on “security actions” regarding Iran.

    Sounds pretty much like the beginning of a run-up to war with Iran….

  • I’m starting to think Congress should hold competency hearings. More often than not, Cheney’s not just wrong, he’s delusional.

  • I know Cheney can’t really come out and saw what is realling going on because then he would not be able to avoid the inevitable questions that follow, but he has to be the only person on the plant to say that the two recent speeches Bush has given have helped the president. I was watching the panel that Charley Rose had assembled and one of them made a point of saying that neither speech had helped – no one disagreed.

    If he really believes what he said, somone ought to look to setting up an intervention or at least investigate mental health options.

  • Black Knight Cheney, on the Iraq War: “The Iraq War is going very well, I think … There’s no doubt we are prevailing, and will prevail … The insurgents are in their last throes, I believe … We’ve had tremendous successes in Iraq … Yes, we’ve taken a few small hits there, but ’tis but a scratch … As for those who say the U.S. military has had its arms and legs cut off, so to speak, well, frankly, they’re just flat-out wrong … Just a flesh wound…”

  • “I think we have made significant progress.” – Big Dick Cheney

    This sentence makes perfect sense if “we” refers to Halliburton and Cheney’s financial interest in the company, and “significant progress” refers to fleecing the US Treasury with impunity. To understand Cheney only requires the secret decoder ring to realize what he is refering to.

  • This is the same guy who almost two years ago reassured us that the insurgency in Iraq was in its “last throes.” That he’s still able to spew such utter crap and have it printed anywhere but the funny papers make me want to “throe up.” Has he ever told us anything that didn’t turn out to be a total fantasy?

  • I hope Dickhead Cheney keeps his delusions going. He and his minions will be flushed down the sewer en masse in 2008, all they need to do is keep denying reality and let the American people do the flushing.

    The worst thing that could happen would be if Dickhead did a 180, allowing the Republicrooks to run against the war in 2008. (depending on the corporate media to muddy the history of whose war this is).

    So keep up the good work, Dick. And go f*** yourself. It’s the same thing.

  • It’s a good thing Cheney has all the charm and appeal of two manure spreaders collided on the highway. If he were anything approaching likable, with his wrongheaded and deeply anti-American views on how government is supposed to function, he’d be far more dangerous than he is.

    As it is, this administration will be remembered as tragic for those damaged by its countless mistakes, and deeply embarrassing for all of us–but hopefully an aberration that somewhat served to shock us as a people back into rationality.

  • Impeachment is the only response. Cheney is making the case for it, and practically begging the Congress to do so, betting that they do not have the nuts to do so. He may be right on that point. I hope not.

    Which is why I was standing between the press stands on the Mall on Saturday yelling “and Cheney” whenever the crowd went into its “Impeach Bush” chant.

  • howard #2: “would that he were only a bucket of warm spit…. ”

    Actually, that’s what I was getting at. It’s ironic for the man to be copping a superior attitude about holding a job that, 50 years ago, was universally believed to be worse than death.

    I was trying to apply Garner’s quote to the Cheney’s character, but I can see how it could be read otherwise.

  • Why does this suprise any of you?
    Cheney knows how stupid Americans think. In 20 years, those video tapes will be used to show how visionary he was, how calm and collected he was.
    They will be used to train the next wave of Harvard MBA’s and the next wave of Corporate Fascists.
    It will show his forsight as to why we had to give up our human rights, to protect the Capitalist way of life. After all, greed and the concentration of power and wealth are sacred in this country, and Joe Bob Beercan will happily sacrifice his kids to perpetuate the delusion that we all have a chance at that golden tower.

    There is more to this than a single fascists’ delusions.

  • When reasonable and serious questions are asked, we occasionally get the clear, unspun truth.

    “Because I told them it had to.” — Bush
    “I’m the decider.” — Bush
    “I’m the decision-maker.” — Bush
    “I am the commander, see?” — Bush
    “Well, I’m vice president and they’re not.” — Cheney
    “I do not need to explain why I say things. — That’s the interesting thing about being the President. — Maybe somebody needs to explain to me why they say something, but I don’t feel like I owe anybody an explanation.” — Bush

    Any questions? Well, yea, but why bother.

  • “Let’s say I believe firmly in Ronald Reagan’s 11th commandment: Thou shalt not speak ill of a fellow Republican. But it’s very hard sometimes to adhere to that where Chuck Hagel is involved.”

    Sure big guy. The fact he’s a vet and could smear your fat flabby ass from the Capitol to the Washington Monument has nothing to do with your adherence to the gospel according to St. Ron.

    Dick will tumble into the deepest pit of hell mouthing the same lies. I’m only sorry this event is unlikely to be captured on film for my viewing pleasure.

  • “Well, I’m vice president and they’re not.”

    Easy to understand if you realize he’s just saying what his role is in this grand charade. He’s saying “I’m supposed to be the number one cheerleader for Bush and those others are not. I can’t respond on the merits of the comments because the vice president doesn’t do that.” I’d expect a similar response from Dan Quayle albeit a much more incoherent one. Something like, “Well, I’m Dan Quayle and not my wife.”

  • Cheney was born in the wrong country. He is far better suited to be in a country where he could have been a compassionless, uncaring dictator. He is also one who has never, never really been held accountable for anything. I’ll bet he never got punched in the nose by other kids. I’ll bet that he got away with lying when he was growing up. By the time he became a chickenhawk he was used to shafting other people and getting away with it. Probably the hardest thing for him all of his life has been pretending that he cares for people, or much of anything but himself.

  • I’m getting the eerie feeling that we are going to see the “news” out of Iraq changing in coming weeks. Something happened and all of a sudden Maliki is in the game. This moring I hear 200 militants were killed this weekend. Even if is it the tail waggin gthe dog, I believe the last effort of the Bush White House will be to manufacture NEWS out of Iraq trying to show the success of the 21,500 troops etc. They need to reverse the momentum and Cheney is going to be the steadfast one who never waivered.

    Cheney, Bush and the whole crew are backed intoa corner and all they have left are desperate longshots.

  • That bleep this morning about “200 suspected insurgents” reminded me of the old one about “200 suspected Vietcong.” Later we found out that any dead body, man, woman, or child, was an enemy body. And Cheney? Well he is a piece of s..t, whistling past the graveyard.

  • “I think we have made significant progress.”

    Wouldn’t the obvious response from an interviewer be “Such as?”

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