Guest Post by Morbo
I was unable to write last week because I was in my Volvo driving back from San Francisco, where I had been attending a meeting of the Vast Left-Wing Conspiracy.
It was a good event. Every day there was a nice spread of organic hummus, flat breads and salads along with a fabulous selection of French wines. Our goodie bags contained cool sandals, Michael Moore DVDs, paperweights containing actual snippets of Martin Sheen’s hair and coupons for free long-distance calls from Working Assets.
The days were busy, but we had nights free for a variety of activities, including French film festivals, pot parties and orgies. The evenings were a little chilly, but that was no problem. We just tossed a few more Bibles into the fireplace.
I am authorized to tell you of an important development: The Ann Coulter Project is being shut down. We all agree it was a smashing success, but Ann’s latest stunt — calling Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards a “faggot” — was simply too much. It’s only a matter of time before the right wing figures out that “Ann” is just an actress hired by progressives to parody right-wing kooks and destabilize their movement. In light of that, we’re going to pull the plug now.
I think we can all agree it was a great run. Who would have thought we would get nearly 10 years out of this?
We expected the right wing to long ago realize that Ann must be a plant and expose her. But let’s face it, they just aren’t that bright. Instead of doing what any sensible person would have done with someone like Ann Coulter — denounced her as an embarrassment and sent her packing — the right wing embraced her, snatched up her books, defended her insane behavior and made her a celebrity.
The actress who portrays Ann has a done a great job and deserves our thanks. I should point out, however, that some other folks did important work behind the scenes that should be acknowledged. For example, we should not overlook the team of comedy writers who produced Ann’s books. They must remain anonymous, but I can tell you that some of them have moved on to “The Daily Show.”
The best thing about this project is that there are now real, actual right wingers parroting Ann’s views, and we’ll all continue to reap the benefits of that. I want to thank everyone who contributed to this project, but of course we must extend laurels to the visionary who thought it up and provided the lion’s share of the funding. I can assure you that Mr. Soros is very pleased with the results.
By the way, the Dinesh D’Souza Project is NOT being shut down. In fact, Dinesh cranked out a new book over the weekend, and I’m sure it will be another best-seller. It is titled “You’re Fat, Unhappy And Broke — And It’s the Liberals’ Fault!”