Most moronic thing said about evolution this week: The envelope please

June 18, 2005

Guest Post by Morbo

I’ve thought about awarding a prize for the dumbest thing said about evolution every week. I’m certain I would have no problem finding winners.

This week’s contender is Connie Morris, a member of the Kansas Board of Education. The Kansas City Star reported that Morris sent a four-page letter to her constituents in which she called evolution a “fairy tale” that has “anti-God contempt and arrogance.”

She also wrote, “In short, Darwin’s theory of evolution is biologically, genetically, mathematically, chemically, metaphysically and etc. wildly and utterly impossible.”

These are bold claims. Morris proposes throwing out the modern underpinning of biology. Surely she has the credentials to do this – perhaps an advanced degree in biochemistry, paleontology or anthropology?

Alas, no. Morris used to teach elementary school. These days she and her husband run a plumbing company.

There is something worse than a theocracy. I call it “ignotocracy” — rule by the ignorant. It has come to Kansas, and I pity the poor children there. Where is a good tornado to whisk them off to the Merry Old Land of Oz when you need one?

Regarding tornadoes: You can’t you use goverment funds for those godless scientists “to seed” clouds with silver iodide to hasten storms. Even faith-based native Americans wouldn’t qualify for funding for a rain dance–because they’re non-christian heathens. It’s the sad truth, Morbo: U R SOL.

  • I suppose dropping houses on them out of a Kansas twister would be out of the question?

  • Morbo, I know you won’t have any difficulty finding worthy candidates for your “Dumbest Evolutionist of the Week” award. I just want to know what criteria you will use to separate those that are simply batshit crazy from those who are truly dangerous to our society. All kidding aside, these people are dangerous, as they tend to be in positions that can influence both a substantial portion of our country AND our youth — and that scares the bejeezus out of me.

    As an aside, I suggest the use of the term “idiocracy” rather than “ignotocracy” — seems easier to pronounce and understand. Thanks!!

  • To clarify my previous post: I refer to “them” only as any adult who espouses throwing out the modern underpinning of biology or anything equally ridiculous. I do NOT advocate dropping houses on innocent little children, no matter how annoying some of them might…

    Well, you get the idea.

  • Cold comfort, probably, but the country has weathered attempted domination by “Know Nothings” before. At great cost, unfortunately.

    I think H.L. Mencken (to whose views I generally do NOT subscribe) already coined a pretty good term: “boobocracy”. One of his statements I do find amusing: “Democracy is the theory that the common knows what he wants and he deserves to get it, good and hard.” I actually have more faith in ordinary people than he did, but in these Bush II days I’m beginning to wonder. As someone on Air America said recently, “the rich get richer, and the poor vote for them”. Beats me.

  • Ed, in today’s political climate Mencken sounds like a veritable prophet. As depressing as the exercise might be, I think if you go check out some of his more famous quotes you’ll see that they are depressingly applicable.

    As for the whole evolution vs ID thing, something which I’ve seen really often in these discussions—and which for some reason isn’t rejected out of hand by “pro-evolutionists”—is the idea that we should allow teachers to teach both evolution/natural selection and ID and let the kids sort it out. The implication is that the teachers are capable and willing to present the two competing ideas rationally in a manner that will educate the kids with the capacity to think critically and logically about them.

    My contention has been, and continues to be, that it’s ridiculous to assume that hick teachers in schools all over the country will be anywhere near willing or even capable of such instruction. Vast numbers of teachers have virtually no understanding of even the barest principles of natural selection, and scads of them are raging fundies who would vilify Darwin and spew their creationist nonsense as truth every chance they’d get. So I was not surprised to see what occupation this particular nutcase had before she decided to work in the plumbing industry: she was a teacher.

    I rest my case.

  • Strange how she calls evolution a “fairy tale” when many non-believers call creationism and religion in general a “fairy tale”.

    I am shaking my head at this woman’s ignorance re science. It reminds me of the saying, “It’s better to keep your mouth shut and let people think you’re a fool than to open it and erase all doubt”. And “we are all entitled to our own opinions, but we are not entitled to our own facts”.

    Hannah, liberal Christian, and believer in the facts and scientific evidence of evolution

  • Any relation to Henry Morris, the famed creationist?

    Anyway, Connie has surpassed the all time record
    for stupidest statement about evolution, one that
    I’ve kept in my prized collection for years. The
    previous record holder is Michael Reagan, the
    president’s fundamentalist/right wing son, who
    once “disproved” the theory of evolution on his
    talk radio show by offering this stunning rebuttal
    (slightly paraphrased):

    “If evolution were true, then how come frogs haven’t
    evolved into human beings?”

    Tis true, tis true. I kid you not. I heard it
    one evening driving home. I used to listen to
    talk radio sometimes just to learn what these
    people were up to. Or down to.

  • I worked once as a plumber for a few years, so I resent the implication that plumbers are ignorant. I challenge any one of you on a quiz about basic drain and exhaust systems; even PhD’s some times don’t have a clue about how they work.
    But going back to the subject, my take on this is that promoting ignorance is typical of totalitarian regimes, instead of analytical thinking allegiance to a dogma is preferred. I believe that the Intelligent Design followers are well financed by Think Tanks that have a more political, rather than theological, agenda in mind.

  • So…let me make sure I’ve got this thing straight: “In short, Darwin’s theory of evolution is biologically, genetically, mathematically, chemically, metaphysically and etc. wildly and utterly impossible”, but the whole making the Earth in six days, walking on water, rising from the dead, etc, etc is as plausible and real as a Big Mac and fries.

    Ah – good plan.

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