The corruption capital of the United States is…

November 28, 2006

Long-time readers know that I take a certain amount of pleasure in mocking South Florida, where I was born and raised. There’s just something uniquely ridiculous about Miami and its surrounding communities that makes the area prone to outlandish, not to mention absurd, circumstances.

And when it comes to politics, South Florida is, quite literally, in a league of its own. Carl Hiaasen recently explained, “The Sunshine State is a paradise of scandals teeming with drifters, deadbeats, and misfits drawn here by some dark primordial calling like demented trout. And you’d be surprised how many of them decide to run for public office.”

With this in mind, it is with great pleasure that I report that South Florida is officially the most corrupt community in the country.

South Florida is the public corruption capital of the country, according to the U.S. Department of Justice.

Between 1996 and 2005, a record-setting 576 people were convicted of federal corruption charges in the district that extends from Key West to Sebastian, according to the agency’s most recent annual report.

That’s far more than the 402 convicted during the same 10 years in Washington, D.C. or the 453 convicted in Chicago, where political machines have been rolling for decades.

New York City, another hotbed of government scandal, didn’t even come close. A mere 374 people were convicted of public corruption charges during the last decade, the report shows.

It’s a well deserved “honor.”

The Palm Beach Post tried to help explain the problem, pointing to “rapid growth, an influx of immigrants who may have a different view of how government business is run, skyrocketing land values and aggressive prosecution are all factors.”

Mike Wilson, the Floridian editor of the St. Petersburg Times, wrote an item (which is no longer available online) suggesting that it’s more of a genetic problem.

Friends in other states expect me to defend Florida in times like these. But like a parent making excuses for an aberrant teenager, justifying it is the best I can do. Look, this isn’t Boston, founded on intellect and the principles of religious freedom. This is Florida, founded by hucksters and luckless dreamers. Eccentricity is in its DNA.

And that’s exactly what locals have come to expect. Long-time readers may also recall that I have this theory that almost all the bad things that happen in this country have an almost direct connection to Florida. The Elian Gonzalez controversy, the 2000 election debacle, the original anthrax letters, the flying lessons for the 9/11 terrorists, the Terri Schiavo matter, the Abramoff deals, the worst drivers in the country, and now the corruption capital of the United States. What else am I supposed to think?

They may have the most rude drivers in the country, but the worst drivers are all in south Louisiana, another state with corruption issues.

Also, Tancredo had some GREAT quotes this week on the region, particularly Miami, and holding that out as to what all goes wrong with immigration. How those folks still vote GOP I have no idea.

  • Ah bummer, I thought my home town of New Orleans would at least make the top of the list. I’m hurt. Oh well, I live in DC now so I can console myself with that little warm and fuzzy thought.

  • The Palm Beach Post tried to help explain the problem, pointing to “rapid growth, an influx of immigrants who may have a different view of how government business is run, skyrocketing land values and aggressive prosecution are all factors.”

    Oh dear me. Not only do those pesky foreigners cause trouble, Florida’s law enforcement officials have the gall do their job. Bring me mah smellin’ salts, Ah feel faint.

    I think it is time Florida wake up to the fact that the only reason we put up with it is because it has nice beaches, some ecologically unique features (rapidly being screwed up by the people) and the Salvador Dali Museum. Were it not for those things we’d saw it off and shove it into the Atlantic a la Bugs Bunny.

    CB, I was going to say you forgot KrazeeKat Harris, but I guess she goes under the 2000 Election. But what about Foley? And the Empire of the Mouse.

  • And that’s exactly what locals have come to expect. Long-time readers may also recall that I have this theory that almost all the bad things that happen in this country have an almost direct connection to Florida.

    Four of the five Watergate burglars were from Miami. Your theory grows stronger.

  • Something about both the corruption and the driver problem makes me pose this question.

    If you did a graph comparing the age distribution throughout the country with the age distribution in South Florida, would you find there are two relative “peaks” in South Florida, 18-29 year olds and 55+.

    Is it me or do both these age groups suffer from being poor drivers and…

    … notably succeptible to victumization by corruption and con games?

    Maybe its not that you have corrupt people in South Florida so much as you have concentrations of their prey.

  • Does this claim by the U.S. Department of Justice finally drive a stake through the political heart of Jeb Bush? File away this story just in case Jeb emerges from his crypt.

  • “What else am I to think?”

    Well, I can’t help but to think of the links to all the corruption happening south of our borders. Lets face it, we are becoming a real banana republic here. If you don’t believe this, just look who we “elected” El Presidente. With corruption comes incompetence and El Jefe has set a new standard in that category.

  • Florida established itself as a “deadbeat’s heaven” after the Civil War. Florida passed a state constitutional amendment after the war that allowed Florida resident’s to exempt up to $1000.

    At the time, in the Reconstruction South, that was a fortune. It was done to encourage people to move there. It still maintains debt exemption laws that are extremely favorable to debtors.

    Corruption may not be in their blood, but it has shaped their laws.

  • So is it the heat, the humidity, the mosquitos or the palmetto bugs that drive people to do such awful things? Or maybe a combination of all four.

    Palmetto bugs, for those who don’t know, are heavily armored flying cockroaches the size of dinner plates that have no fear of light, or people for that matter.

    Those alone would have me going postal within a matter of hours, so it’s probably a good thing I don’t live in Florida. 😉

  • Curmudgeon – yes the heat, humidity, and flying cockroaches do make people do crazy things. The things I did to avoid the heat/humidity and kill the flying ickies…….

  • My husband, as a teenager, moved to Jacksonville with his mother and stepfather. (I know Jacksonville isn’t in South Florida, but, as the following will confirm, North Florida isn’t all that different.) He likes to regale me with tales from this experience, including, (1) the mayor talked openly about how good the money was for him as mayor–and then was re-elected!, and (2) the entire Jacksonville school district lost its accreditation, the “death penalty” of education and a penalty that is almost never imposed. That sent him screaming from the state; he moved to Oregon and his father’s family, as he wanted to go to college and knew he’d have trouble if his high school diploma came from an unaccredited system. Incidentally, we had an opportunity to move to Pensacola at one point; we briefly visited the place, and promptly turned the offer down. We’ve been happily ensconced in the Pacific Northwest ever since, perhaps not coincidentally the farthest location in the lower 48 from Florida.

  • Curmudgeon–we have a saying in New Orleans: “It ain’t the heat, it’s the stupidity.” So you can include that in the equation.

  • Rebecca, The Pacific Northwest is Great, isn’t it? Well, it was until I returned last night. Standing four hours in 27° breezes outside the airport, wearing the clothes I had on in Southern California all last week, waiting for a damned cab or shuttle express isn’t my idea of fun. Hoping tomorrow to go the remaining 90 miles from Seattle to Bellingham, which isn’t prepared for its 15″ of drifting snow, isn’t either.

  • “Hoping tomorrow to go the remaining 90 miles from Seattle to Bellingham, which isn’t prepared for its 15″ of drifting snow, isn’t either. ” – Ed Stephan

    You know that Global Warming puts more energy into the weather systems, which means, amoung other joyful effects, more dramatic winters 😉

  • “You know that Global Warming puts more energy into the weather systems, which means, amoung other joyful effects, more dramatic winters.” – Lance

    Wait wait wait, you mean we’re now going to have global COOLING in winter to go with global WARMING the rest of the time??

    The only question I have is, do I take a pill now or wait for the headache to show up? Oy……

  • I currently live in SoFla (Ft. Lauderdale area), and it’s even worse than CB painted the picture. We’re coming up on seven years here, and are seriously considering putting the house on the market and moving back to Seattle. I wonder if I can get my old job back at Amazon.com.

    I’m not sure about the snow in Bellingham, Ed, but it usually only lasts a couple of days in Seattle, if it even bothers to snow.

  • What about New Jersey? On a per capita basis, it’s got to be among the leaders. — JRS Jr , @6

    Looking at the quoted explanations:
    “rapid growth, an influx of immigrants who may have a different view of how government business is run, skyrocketing land values and aggressive prosecution are all factors.”

    Perhaps NJ is lacking the last-mentioned factor (aggressive prosecution)? The list CB quotes is based on the numbers of *convictions*

  • I spent my teen years in St. Pete, and I can tell you that the corruption doesn’t suddenly drop off at the borders of Dade and Orange counties.

    When I left FL for Boulder, CO, I told everyone I met that Florida has two kinds of citizens: con artists and marks. If you’re not either, you don’t belong there.

    Even major corporations like Disney were corrupt and dishonest, and not because of corporate identity, but because the people they had to choose their employees from were either crooks or victims.

    I may have to go back to the Space Coast on an extended business trip in the near future, and I’m hoping that at least it’s a little better there.

  • I was sure Northern Idaho would at least make the list for this honor. Sometimes it makes Florida and Mississippi look good. The drivers? We in Washington (state) don’t call them DWI (driving while Idahonian) for nothing.

  • http://surfsideflorida.blogspot.com

    BOY! Does this hit home!!!!!

    Our blog is on this very subject of corruption, for the tiny town of Surfside, Florida. We\’re an oceanside town of 5,600 homeowners, nestled on theeastern coast of south Florida minutes north of South Beach, on the barrier island knowns as Miami Beach, in Dade County. We are in the midst of a corrupt government which was elected as slate of 4 commissioners and a mayor, who lied their way into our town with the sole purpose to later reap rewards from the profits they\’ll make as land owners in the business and condo district of our town, after they have deleted our well thought out codes — specifically ethics and zoning. They are rewriting and in the midst of recodeifing right now, \”Customizing\” (to their needs) as best suited to their own greedy corrupt intentions after they step down.

    This administration is backed by developers, real estate professionals, including well-known architects, who have enlisted ex-cons to help implement silence through terror tactics.

    The http://www.surfsideflorida.blogspot.com blog chronicles mindboggling events involving greedy intentioners among a set of people with incestuous connections between felons and what was up to now, very influential and well known individuals. Kudos for the extensive research done on this expose.

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