This Week in God

Saturday-morning contributor Morbo tried to appropriate This Week in God for his own purposes about an hour ago, but I’ve reclaimed control of the God Machine in a bloodless coup. First up is a flap over a life-sized Chocolate Jesus in New York City.

A planned Holy Week exhibition of a nude, anatomically correct chocolate sculpture of Jesus Christ was canceled Friday after Cardinal Edward Egan and other outraged Catholics complained.

The “My Sweet Lord” display was shut down by the hotel that houses the Lab Gallery in midtown Manhattan. Roger Smith Hotel president James Knowles cited the public outcry for his decision.

And guess who was behind all of this? The Catholic League’s Bill Donohue, who called the chocolate display “one of the worst assaults on Christian sensibilities ever.” (Really, Bill? Ever? In two millennia, this is among the very worst?)

David Kuo, formerly of Bush’s faith-based office, had a different, and less unhinged, perspective, concluding that the six-foot, milk-chocolate sculpture might be “the perfect piece of art for holy week.”

Jesus’ story isn’t nice, it isn’t neat, it isn’t comfortable. It is the opposite of all of those things. In so many ways those of us who say we follow Jesus actually want a sort of “chocolate Jesus” of our own – one that is sweet, one that demands little from us, one that we can mold into our forms – perhaps politically conservative, perhaps liberal, maybe happy with just a few of our dollars given to the poor every now and again, perhaps content with those who simply say they love him and then lead lives little different from anyone else.

It is easy for some religious leaders to decry a piece of art and say – as some have (apparently with a straight face) – it is “one of the worst assaults on Christian sensibilities ever.” (I suppose that genocide in Darfur is merely an “affront” to Christian sensibilities?) But instead of getting all amped up over this “art,” Christians should be spending time facing the real and very challenging Jesus found in the Gospels and encouraging others to do the same. I know that is what I need to do.

Bill Donohue, I think he’s talking to you.

Next up is a story from Capitol Hill, where, apparently, there’s a “Congressional Prayer Caucus” that held a disconcerting event in DC this week.

A bipartisan group of U.S. House members offered a simple message to the American people [Wednesday]: “Pray, or God will lift his caring hand from the great nation.”

Over three dozen representatives joined U.S. Rep. J. Randy Forbes (R-Va.) on the west lawn of the U.S. Capitol today to urge Americans to pray for the U.S. and its leaders for at least five minutes each week. Forbes, who is also the leader of the Congressional Prayer Caucus, said he hopes “God will hear our prayers and heal our land.”

Each member spoke for 30 seconds, and many gave personal testimony about the power of prayer in their personal and professional lives. Several members put a sectarian spin on their messages, suggesting that surrendering to Jesus Christ is the only thing that could save our nation. U.S.Rep. Bill Sali (R-Idaho) beseeched the nation to “glorify the name of Jesus Christ,” because as his colleague Todd Akin (R-Mo.) said, “Jesus is always the answer.”

U.S. Rep. John Carter (R-Texas) said “prayer is the solution” to America’s many problems. Remarks were greeted with “Amen!” “Yes!” and “Thank You, Jesus!” from the small crowd of mostly Hill staffers and tourists.

Forbes mentioned that his colleagues were calling people of all faiths to pray, but that they would “let God sort out” which were the “right” prayers, done in the “right” way. Interestingly, Christianity was the only faith represented at today’s gathering.

Yes, “interesting.”

And finally this week, the latest scientific study of healing prayers produced results that the faithful might find discouraging.

In the largest study of its kind, researchers found that having people pray for heart bypass surgery patients had no effect on their recovery. In fact, patients who knew they were being prayed for had a slightly higher rate of complications. […]

Dr. Herbert Benson of Harvard Medical School and other scientists tested the effect of having three Christian groups pray for particular patients, starting the night before surgery and continuing for two weeks. The volunteers prayed for “a successful surgery with a quick, healthy recovery and no complications” for specific patients, for whom they were given the first name and first initial of the last name.

The patients, meanwhile, were split into three groups of about 600 apiece: those who knew they were being prayed for, those who were prayed for but only knew it was a possibility, and those who weren’t prayed for but were told it was a possibility.

The researchers didn’t ask patients or their families and friends to alter any plans they had for prayer, saying such a step would have been unethical and impractical.

The study looked for any complications within 30 days of the surgery. Results showed no effect of prayer on complication-free recovery. But 59 percent of the patients who knew they were being prayed for developed a complication, versus 52 percent of those who were told it was just a possibility.

Dr. Harold G. Koenig, director of the Center for Spirituality, Theology and Health at the Duke University Medical Center, concluded that science “is not designed to study the supernatural.” That’s one of many possible responses to the results, isn’t it?

I think Bill Donohue is “one of the worst assaults on Christian sensibilities ever,” but what do I know? Besides, Jesus told me he wishes those Congressmen would stop talking nonsense and get back to work on lives of service, caring for the poor and sick.

  • I think all those politicians (NY’s Cardinal Savonarola Egan included) ought to give a public reading of Chapter XVIII of Machiavelli’s Prince, entitled “Concerning The Way In Which Princes Should Keep Faith”. They should also be required to disclose their bank accounts while reading aloud Matthew 5-7, commonly called “The Sermon on the Mount”.

    On prayer, I recommend Francis Galton’s “Statistical Inquiries Into The Efficacy Of Prayer”, The Fortnightly Review., No. LXVIII. New Series.—August 1, 1872. Galton concludes that prayer is not demonstrably efficacious.

  • It’s been suggested on other forums that in order to ‘apologize’ (or such) for the chocolate Jesus, they make another one, only with white chocolate instead.

    Also, that prayer study is over a year old. Jon Stewart even mentioned at some point back then.

  • Perusing the Senate’s website recently, I found the following on the Senate chaplin’s page, which–as a non-theist–bugged me:

    “Throughout the years, the United States Senate has honored the historic separation of Church and State, but not the separation of God and State… all sessions of the Senate have been opened with prayer, strongly affirming the Senate’s faith in God as Sovereign Lord of our Nation.”

    http://senate.gov/reference/office/chaplain.htm

  • A worse assault on Christian sensibilities would be either a naked chocolate James Dobson or Pat Robertson.

  • Bill Donohue: living proof of where all the slurs against the Irish made by the English came from. If only his ancestors had been on one of the “coffin ships” that sank.

  • Notice that all the down on their knees types at the prayer vigil are Republicant’s? Of course, we know where they got that extra layer of padding on their knees from.

  • “…the six-foot, milk-chocolate sculpture might be “the perfect piece of art for holy week.”

    I knew it before I read it. The problem is the milk-chocolate. This is Jesus, not some second rate disciple or saint. And as such the sculpture should have been Dark Chocolate. The real deal. Milk chocolate is for the masses whereas Bill is a connoisseur and knows that anything less than dark chocolate for “The Man” is blasphemy. Believers through the ages have known this.

    Jesus is Scharffen Berger all the way. He ain’t no Hershey’s Kiss. Donohue’s outrage is understandable.

  • Not only is the chocolate Jesus brown, but CNN reports it is anatomically correct. (How they confirmed the correctness of Jesus’ middle anaotmy is beyond me) So it’s easy to see how the more rabid Christians would get so flummoxed. They don’t know whether to pray, or hide the white wimmins.

  • Bill Donohue couldn’t think his way out of a paper bag, and his insipid comments on “My Sweet Lord” prove that. Bill doesn’t understand his own religion if he is offended by the fact that Jesus is depicted with a penis, since after all he was a man and was therefore as anatomically correct as any other male. That the artist chose to reinforce Jesus’ humanity with an accurate depiction of his human anatomy is perfectly consistent with any church’s teachings about Christ. Bill is just ashamed of the human form. And with his own his own form, he should be.

    My own personal definition of a cult is an organization that has to use threats and intimidation to get others to do their bidding. The congressional prayer caucus, according to me, is therefore a cult. “Pray or else you’re gonna get it” is a pretty lame MO for the group.

  • I guess this would be a bad time to point out to Donohue that about ten years ago Tom Waits recorded a song called Chocolate Jesus. Bill is just sooooo behind the curve.

  • Praying for 5 minutes a day is easier than putting in 8 solid hours of work, so I don’t blame them for wanting to do that. All the same, their pay ought to be docked for that time — a la WalMart.

    OTOH… the mention of tourists observing the circus got me thinking. What if that particular tourist attraction (ie daily prayer on the front lawn, rain and shine) were used as a fundraiser? Sort of like taking photos of the beaver-hatted soldiers at Buckingham palace (and other places — I’ve seen it also in Prague and in Copenhagen). You pay for the priviledge and the money goes to the upkeep of the institution. Cheaper than the other places, too, since they don’t have to have those fancy costumes…

  • Welcome to ignorance: The entire Arab community threw a hissy fit when Allah was portrayed in a cartoon, and actual lives were lost in protest over it. Meanwhile, back at the Middle East ranch, anti-Jesus cartoons and other anti-semitic political cartoons festooned the front pages of prominent Arab newspapers.

    Why can’t non-Christians see how offensive these displays are? This junk masquerading as art is highly anti-semitic (just listen to what the artist says about his ‘purpose’ in doing the art.)

    But, as usual, Liberals miss the point: In their small minds: it’s o.k. to disrespect Christians, but please don’t disrespect hate-filled Arabs.

  • As an Athiest (which I suppose is liberal… shrug) I can assure you that we hold in contempt any person who believes in an invisible, bearded man who is interested in what people do in their bedrooms. Christian, Jew, Muslim, you name it – we find the devotion that the majority of the world has with the supernatural quite amusing. That is, of course, until someone gets killed.

    Why the pretense? Just wear the loincloths, don the nose bone and carry a spear – seriously, get it done with already.

    P.S.
    Thunder and Lightening isn’t caused by god getting mad.

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