Worst. Posts. Ever.

Kevin Drum got the ball rolling the other day, seeking nominations for the worst blog posts of all time. After mulling it over for a few days, I have a few thoughts.

I should note from the outset that I like to think I have a decent memory, but I’m bound to forget some real doozies. Especially when it comes to my friends on the other side of the ideological spectrum, I read dozens of far-right blogs every day for one of my other gigs. On a typical afternoon, I probably say, “I can’t believe how insane this is” at least five times. After a few years of this, most of the truly offensive conservative posts blur together into one giant insult.

With that in mind, I have five nominations of unforgettable posts from the last year or so. In no particular order:

* Debbie Schlussel’s post on Barack Obama’s non-existent Islamic background: This would belong on the list for its unfounded accusations alone, but what makes this piece special was its closing sentence: “The facts about Obama’s Muslim background raise a LOT of questions… Anyone who does not want to look into the questions and, instead, attacks those who ask them, is equally suspect in their intentions and attitudes toward the continued freedom of this country.” Perfect.

* John Derbyshire’s post on the Virginia Tech shootings: The NRO writer expressed contempt for the victims of the massacre, because they didn’t try to physically confront the shooter. Indeed, Derbyshire expected those who feared for their lives to recognize that the madman was using a .22-caliber gun, which he said probably wouldn’t do “real damage.” Derbyshire’s thoughts were a special kind of stupid, combing a unique blend of blame-the-victim arrogance, Monday-morning quarterbacking, unearned machismo, and a breathtaking degree of callousness.

* Ann Althouse’s post on the Clinton campaign’s Sopranos parody: Freudian analysis taken to a comedic extreme. Onion rings are vaginas, carrots are penises, sliced carrots are attacks on penises, moisture on carrots are bodily fluids … it was the clearest example I’ve ever seen of a twisted right-wing imagination.

* John Hinderaker’s post after meeting Bush: After a White House meeting with the president, Power Line’s Hinderaker said Bush’s performance “may have been the best I’ve ever seen any politician.” The sycophantic praise was breathtaking — Bush surpassed Reagan in communication skills, he’s like a “big brother,” he’s strong enough to “withstand the Washington snake pit and deal with a daily barrage of hate from the ignorant left,” and he “derives real joy from the opportunity … to participate in the great pageant of American history.” Sweet Jeebus. There’s hero worship and then there’s this.

* Michelle Malkin’s “The Defeatocrats’ Cheer.” I still can’t believe it’s not a parody.

There’s some overlap between my list and Kevin’s, and John Cole has a few more to consider. If you had any “favorites” to add, I’m all ears.

John Cole’s #4 sprang immediately to my mind. Althouse is slightly crazy, but Breastageddon was absolutely the craziest thing she’d ever written.

  • Good examples. The Derbyshire and Althouse ones are special standouts for me, but I don’t go around reading this stuff (with the way the trolls go after me on Kev’s stie and sometimes on this site (some of them are parodies, I’m sure- Ultimate Hayseed Commando, for one), if anybody ever heard I read conservative blogs, I’m sure it wouldn’t be too long before some of the dumber liberals started to wonder if that means I’m a conservative, no matter how many other liberals check out conservative sites or no matter how much they think it’s ok for they themselves to read those site), I just see it reported on your site and Kev’s- so I don’t see a lot of what goes on.

  • Kev’s stie

    That was supposed to be “Kev’s site,” not “Kev’s stie,” just in case any susceptible paranoids are wondering.

  • I think Kev’s post where he asked his readers whether or not they close the door to the bathroom when they use it when they’re home alone should be nominated, though. Probably shouldn’t win, but it should at least be nominated. And how about those catblogging posts that had baby talk written on the cat photos?

  • Someone needs to go dig through the past few years of Winger awards over at Poor Man Institute to get a couple of really good ones….

  • I thought it was “Atlas Sneezed” as that better describes the type of informational particles that spew forth from that site

  • Marcus jogged by memory to this vomit-inducing piece by Pam Atlas – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Evdf3HfyUWg — her first “music video” called my sharia done to the tune of My Sharonna. The there’s her “interview” with John Bolton. Pam’s Glenn Beck with tits or a more stupid Michelle Malkin.

  • Is the Assrocket himself submitting posts to other sites under the pseudonym “joewilson”?

  • The worst thing about Derbyshire’s post, and the question “Why didn’t anybody rush the guy?,” is that he had no way of knowing that nobody rushed the guy. So he was Monday-morning quarterbacking without having even seen the play.

  • Jonah Goldberg’s Oct 26. op-ed claiming that Ted Kennedy started the whole politics of personal destruction by going after Robert Bork’s nomination in 1987, and that the conservative attacks against Dukakis in 1988 and Clinton in 1992 were just reactions to those evil liberals and their dirty tactics:

    http://article.nationalreview.com/?q=YjdhNDY1NmY4NmM4ODJiZDNlNDFmZDQ2ODRhZjQ3OTY=

    Yeah, if it wasn’t for that mean old Ted Kennedy, the GOP wouldn’t have to stoop so low as to use the Willie Horton ads in 1988, or spread rumors that HIllary had Vince Foster killed.

    CREEP? Never heard of them.
    Lee Atwater? Don’t know the guy.

  • Derbyshire’s thoughts were a special kind of stupid, combing a unique blend of blame-the-victim arrogance, Monday-morning quarterbacking, unearned machismo, and a breathtaking degree of callousness.

    Great line!

  • Why does it take a special kind of stupid to be a right-wing female?

    That their stupid is spread equally between genders is astounding. It’s the only thing that is…

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